Some girls are just born with glitter in their veins

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watching

March 10, 2014 Love4JLK

I am starting to get so exhausted. I can’t fall asleep. When I do its a restless sleep..I think it’s often filled with nightmares. And the kids are waking up a lot at night. Not a good combination. Still this morning I felt a urge to run…so I did. I want to just keep running. […]

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ok again

March 9, 2014 Love4JLK

I had a ok day today… ..then I got on FB and we turned on the TV. Totally stupid on my part. The reason I stay home all the time is I am comfortable…and in control. Yet I let this outside source impact me tonight.   A year ago Jennifer and Tony walked to the […]

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her arms

March 8, 2014 Love4JLK

**this is a blessing of a blog for me tonight. Through writing tonight I made some huge connections(so please excuse the jumbled thoughts…and thank you for continuing to ride a long with me***   Illusion. Sesame street has a word on the street….well that’s my word on the Kranz boulevard. Its like I cannot absorb […]

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weight

March 6, 2014 Love4JLK

This morning I did not want to get out of bed…I felt too heavy to move. I am lucky. Tony got up with the kids and let me lay in bed a bit longer. I think I might have stayed in bed all day..but we had art therepy coming over for our boys. Currently its […]

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too much

March 5, 2014 Love4JLK

I was out of the house all day. Lesson learned….it was far too long. I feel like I need to re-set my body and mind. Get settled in again with myself…. We went to the cemetery this morning. We picked her plot…the plot..that one day.. . . hopefully sooner rather than later I will share […]

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watch

March 4, 2014 Love4JLK

Tomorrow (well technically today) we go back to the cemetery. Tonight I watch videos of her…and I miss her… beyond words… glitter shoot team Jennifer  

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darker

March 3, 2014 Love4JLK

Darkness…I have swallowed it in. There is a difference between wanting to die and wanting to kill yourself. I never knew that before. …now I know it. Now I live it. or rather am barely surviving it. And I feel lucky that Tony can totally understand it. Because right now the tears are so strong […]

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splintered

March 1, 2014 Love4JLK

It has been a week since your services. So tonight Charlotte and I went through all the letters..those tangible expressions of love. I waited since it was the final part of that day..that beautifully tragic day. The death of your child. Its splinters and rips at all areas of our lives. Changes so much of […]

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every room

February 28, 2014 Love4JLK

I parented…I mean like really parented her up until the 10 days before she died. I am reminded everyday I walk by the sticker chart I made her right before we left for our make a wish trip. I’m glad I did that. I remember my mom saying to me (before we knew it would […]

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4 months

February 27, 2014 Love4JLK

Today I just couldn’t. I stayed in bed til nearly 4. Luckily my parents had the boys and Tony, my sister and my friend took turns with Charlotte. We did go through the stack of boxes of medical equipment finally. Today marks 2 weeks since she died… tomorrow marks 4 months since her diagnosis… …and […]

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